First things first, here’s three reasons why YOU should NOT buy my book:

1. You are a terrible manager and you can’t do your job. I’m not here to babysit I’m here to improve those of you who are already good at your jobs.

2. You have a lot of time on your hands and the time to do lots of extra work. This book is short and to the point, it’s not for people who need to be lectured.

3. You want life coaching or quotes to print out and put around your computer screen. You are generally fairly stupid and probably believe in horoscopes. I can’t help you. Nobody can.

NB: if you are the right person to read this book I will be telling you things you already know but are not allowed to say out loud in front of your boss or staff. I just want you to know that you were right to think like that all along.